Newsflash: A Less Hateful Type of Golf

27 Aug

More great news!  I played golf (with the hubs of course) tonight.  And here’s the ca-razy part: I didn’t even hate it. Can you believe it!?  Nope me either.  Wondering how that’s even remotely possible?  Here are the reasons why Glowball is *so* much less detestable:

  1. Glowball is a scramble. But not of the eggs variation.  In the odd world of golf that means everybody hits and you play from the best ball.  Which is somehow different than the best-ball tournaments – hermmmm. I’m still not sure what the point of me actually bothering swinging to hit my ball was, but that scramblyness totally takes the pressure off.  Especially when you’re playing with other quite-talented-in-this-area folks.
  2. You celebrate afterwards with pizza and coffee.  You and I both know you simply cannot go wrong with pizza and coffee.  Especially right before bed.  As a matter of fact – my belly is telling me that right now by way of protrusion.
  3. The glow-in-the-dark aspect gives a funkadelic effect to an otherwise terribly boring sport.  We had adorable tiny glowsticks to put *in* our (clear) balls and glowy necklaces (or headbands in my case) to wear.  There were even glowy badges to put in the hole so you could aim!  It was like shooting stars (I could really use a wish right now, wish right now, wish right now) on command.
  4. You play in six-ums. Which is mostly great because of the name.
  5. It’s only 9 holes.  All of which you play with a cart.  Critical to the lack of hate.
  6. There’s black bean lasagna (Mexican meets Italian and makes a yummy baby) waiting for you  @ the course when you arrive.  I’m pretty sure that’s consistent with all glowball tournaments.
  7. Nobody can see you hitting.  Suddenly, with the absence of sunshine, every whiff becomes a practice swing.  Glorious.
  8. When you get home and google how to spell ‘whif’ you learn about “a new approach to eating by breathing.”  Which leads you to feel sorry for some folk, which I suppose isn’t so much of a reason that glowball is loverly.
  9. Did I mention that nobody sees you swinging?
  10. People laugh when your little glowing ball shoots straight up in the air and drops back onto the ground 27 inches in front of you.  I’m pretty sure it’s the laughing with you not at you kind too – bonus.
  11. (Just for good measure) Complete darkness really levels the playing field.  For whatever reason, others drop several degrees in skill and draw much closer to my impressive degree of ineptitude in golf.  And I’m cool with that.

All in all, you can see how that’s a winning combination.  Now the only key will be convincing Clifton Springs Country Club to host glowball tournaments weekly instead of yearly.  Honestly, it’d mean I’d play a couple times of year and I’m sure that would be incentive enough for them.


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